hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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