been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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