the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
she smelled like a LAN party
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
