Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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