Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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