:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Randomize
