its not stalking. its research.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
