you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize