dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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