Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
The struggles of a small town man whore
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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