nut hugger
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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