CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Can you bring me the toilet please
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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