Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
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