We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
