you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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