I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
He kissed a someone with a penis
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
