I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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