Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize