whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
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