come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
