if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize