There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
