no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize