haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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