I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
