They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Is it because I queefed?
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
PANTIES FOUND
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
