My sheets look like a crime scene.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
