Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
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