We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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