I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize