i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize
