We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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