what day is it and did you see me today?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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