If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
