Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
