We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize