Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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