You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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