you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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