Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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