Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
