everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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