maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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