I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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