Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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