I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
is this the sara with the beer cane?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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