hell yes lets make some ravioli
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
