hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
