I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
and she was petting her beer can
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize