GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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