she looked like the before picture.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Walk of Shame today included voting.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
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